I Have it All… Now How Do I Juggle It?

To Have it all…

For many women, having it all is the ultimate, seemingly unattainable, dream. However, once they accomplish it — getting that dream job, finding the ideal spouse and producing some precocious and adorable offspring – they find that achieving this goal isn’t nearly as difficult as balancing it all once you have it all. If you are in the middle of a masterful juggling act, try out these tips as they may make it substantially easier for you to keep all of your balls in the air.

Don’t Neglect your Health

When you find yourself pulled in a million different directions, it can be tempting to put yourself on the back burner, skipping those exercise classes or grabbing quick-and-tasty food on the go instead of eating balanced meals. While these practices may save you time in the short term, in the long run neglecting your health could prove a disastrous decision. Your body will take this type of abuse for a while, but eventually it will rebel against you, forcing you to slow down or crash, likely at the most inopportune time.

Focus Your Efforts

While it is entirely natural for your mind to wander to the tasks you have waiting for you at home while you are at work, and vice versa, if you constantly give in to this tendency you will dramatically reduce your overall productivity. When you are at work, push home worries aside and you will be able to get your work done more rapidly, potentially even reducing the number of hours you end up spending on the job.

Prioritize

When you have so many items on your to do list that you feel it will soon swallow you whole, it can be difficult to decide which to tackle first, potentially leading you to abandon the list entirely and throw yourself a pity party on the couch, complete with ice cream. Instead of giving in to this temptation, become master of your list by learning to adeptly prioritize. After crafting your list of things to do, be it for home or work, rank each item from 1 to 5, assigning a 1 to the post pressing tasks and a 5 to those that can wait. This simple task will allow you to immediately narrow your focus, showing you exactly where you should start.

 

Stick to a Schedule – Usually

As you work to climb the corporate ladder you will likely find yourself putting in extra hours on the job. On occasion, a late night at work is simply a must; however, for the sake of your family, you shouldn’t allow every night to become a late night. Commit yourself to arriving home in time for dinner with your family at least four nights each work week. By doing so you can ensure that you have ample time to spend appreciating the family you so carefully built while still fulfilling your on-the-job duties.

The Life and Accomplishments of Ingrid Boulting

Ingrid Boulting; An Inspiration

It was not surprising that Ingrid Boulting came back to acting in 2006 for a role in the movie Conversations with God, a movie based on the inspirational, internationally-acclaimed books by Neale Donald Walsch. Achieving emancipating, mature spirituality, after all, has been one of Boulting’s life-long goals. In essence, the film was a symbolic culmination of this goal.

Like Walsch, Boulting has been on a quest for illuminating answers from an early age; the former sought guidance from God, the latter from life/nature and from within. Although most Hollywood celebrities get swallowed up by success, Boulting, after experiencing it, voluntarily gave it up for (as she prophetically says in the movie The Last Tycoon) “a quiet life” somewhere.

Career Achievements

Without question, Boulting has an extraordinary curriculum vitae. At a young age she (born: 1947 in Transvaal, South Africa) was drawn into the very artistically demanding world of ballet, to which she devoted over a decade of her life. Ballet then led to successful model, gracing the pages of magazines such as Harper’s Bazaar, Vogue, Seventeen, London Life, Celebrity Sleuth, and countless others.

Dancing and Modeling

While dancing and modeling, she discovered the wonderful world of drawing/painting — crafts which she has pursued to this day. Apparently destined to delve into different areas of the fine arts, Boulting then discovered acting, first on stage and then in the movies. Amazingly, she went on to do a series of movies spanning over three decades: The Witches (1966); Inadmissible Evidence (1968); The Last Tycoon (1976); Deadly Passion (1985) among them.

The fact that Ingrid Boulting has had a successful career is indisputable, but that is not what sets her apart from other celebrities. In fact, some people (if they know who she is) may even label her success as “mediocre.”

The following facts, however, suggest otherwise:

  • Her pretty face being featured on hundreds of pages in major publications.
  • Co-acting with such Hollywood greats as Orson Wells, Olivia de Haviland, Robert DeNiro, Tony Curtis, Robert Mitchum, Ray Milland and Jack Nicholson.
  • Being a successful artist since 1993.
  • Being a knowledgeable yoga instructor.
  • Acting on stage, TV and films.
  • Offering sliding scale pricing for the financially disadvantaged at her yoga studio .

A Renaissance Woman

While famous actresses often develop bad reputations, Miss Boulting espouses and advocates a clean, healthy lifestyle that is respectful to all living things. In fact, as a Yoga instructor, she helps people get in tune with nature and discover ways to stay healthy without the use of artificial tools or methods.

Through her art work, Boulting shares beautiful creations on canvas, as those people who continue to buy her renditions can no doubt attest. Although she has not received formal art training, Boulting has been painting since she was a child. Her teachers, she says, are heavyweights like Michelangelo, Paul Cezanne, Gustav Klimt, Valesquez, John Singer Sargent, James Whistler and Jean Antoine Watteau; she was also guided by the museums she visited while growing up.

Ingrid Boulting the Entrepreneur

In addition to all her other “roles,” Ingrid Boulting has become a very astute entrepreneur. Proving that one does not have to become a slave to one’s profession (in her case, a Hollywood celebrity), Miss Boulting founded and runs her own successful business, Sacred Space Studio. This facility, located in Ojai, California, provides yoga classes and other services. Going by the client testimonials on her website, ingridboulting.com, it has become a haven for people looking for spiritual/physical healing and empowerment.

Above all, though, is Ingrid Boulting’s commitment to family — more specifically, her daughter, Cheyne Rose, for whom she sacrificed her career. Would anyone other than a loving mother do that? In a world where obtaining wealth, fame, and associations with powerful people seem to be popular goals, Boulting has proven that one can reach for worthier, more lasting things . . . and still become self-fulfilled, happy and financially successful!

Book Helps Men Support and Understand Breast Cancer Patients

A Book About Breast Cancer, and more…

Sometimes the gift of a book can help someone you care about gain the information and perspective necessary to get through a tough time. What if that tough time involves a dad, brother or friend who doesn’t quite know what to do when breast cancer attacks someone he loves, whether mother, sister, wife or daughter?

A good choice might be to give him a copy of John W. Anderson’s book Stand by Her: A Breast Cancer Guide for Men.

Learning the Hard Way

Learning the right ways to give support during cancer treatment may not come naturally for a man, but Anderson’s book can make the process easier. During the 31 years prior to its publication, Anderson learned more about breast cancer than anyone except a doctor should have to know. He lost his mother to the bewildering disease in 1988 following her 10-year battle.

Thirteen years later, Anderson’s wife was diagnosed with breast cancer despite no family history of the illness. Another year passed, and his younger sister was in treatment for breast cancer. Over the years, the author as also watched two friends fight breast cancer. Somewhere along the way, he realized that he wanted to be a resource for other men trying to support mothers, wives, sisters and daughters through the illness.

From Black to Pink

Anderson assigned colors to each chapter of his book. The first chapter is represented by black for the darkness of first feelings following the diagnosis. The last chapter is pink for the cheerful feelings that accompany arriving at the 5-year remission mark. Along the way, Anderson explains what to expect about surgery, chemotherapy, radiation treatment, reconstructive surgery and the years of worry afterward about whether the cancer will return.

The book combines anecdotes from Anderson’s and other men’s experiences on the sidelines of breast cancer. It arms readers with information about research and resources as well as strategies for handling the medical, psychological and emotional surprises that arise when providing support.

Listening, Loving, Laughing

In particular, Anderson emphasizes listening well from the moment of diagnosis. Instead of trying to take over and solve the situation, he suggests that as caregivers, men need to be prepared to reflect women’s emotions. This may involve validating anger or laughing during lighter moments.

Men need to follow where these emotions lead rather than minimizing, ignoring or reacting to them in a way that stirs conflict. Anderson indicates that it is the woman’s illness, so the woman has a right to her feelings.

In the case of a husband and wife, reassurance also means reaching out with affection and intimacy if and when the wife is ready.

Positivity and Appreciation

Men can help surround the woman who has breast cancer with positive influences — a support team of friends, doctors, and people with similar spiritual beliefs. Anderson says that when possible, male caregivers need to remove any people who make the patient feel negative.

Everyone within this support group should strive to help the patient see that a happy ending is more than likely if the breast cancer was detected early. Whichever hand the patient has been dealt, her supporters should reinforce the preciousness of the here and now.

Remember that when you give this kind of book to a friend who is troubled about the illness of an important woman in his life, you help him to stand by her and you stand by both of them.

Sports and Fitness: A Guide to Staying in Shape

Staying in Shape

As a woman, keeping your body healthy and in shape is something you need to pay attention to, not only so you look good, but so you feel good too. Your metabolism changes as you get older, and you may find that staying in shape requires more effort this year than it did the year before. There are plenty of sports and fitness activities you can participate in to stay in shape, and perhaps the most important thing to do is to find one or more activities you enjoy. Doing enjoyable activities is great motivation to exercise on a regular basis, so build some of the activities that appeal to you into your schedule.

How much exercise should you get?

The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention recommend that women get at least 150 minutes per week of moderate-intensity aerobic exercise or at least 75 minutes per week of vigorous aerobic exercise. Aerobic exercise should be done in increments of at least 10 minutes to get the health benefits. In addition, the CDC recommends that women participate in strength activities at least twice per week. Exercising more than these guidelines will lead to even more health benefits, and especially if you’re looking to lose weight, you should do twice as much aerobic exercise as the baseline recommendations.

What types of sports and fitness activities should you consider?

Women enjoy a wide range of activities, and for many women, exercising is just as much about the social aspect as it is about the physical side. If you can’t find the motivation to exercise on your own, choose an activity that you can do with other women, which not only provides accountability, but also gives you someone to chat with as you exercise. Don’t be afraid to try a wide range of activities to find the ones that you really enjoy. Joining a gym can be a great way to have access to the equipment and instruction you need for some of these activities.

  • Yoga is a very popular fitness activity for women, who especially enjoy that it engages their minds and promotes relaxation. Because yoga mostly involves holding specific poses, it actually falls more into the strength category than the aerobic category.
  • Swimming is an aerobic exercise that many women enjoy if they have access to a pool or lake during moderate seasons. Lap swimming works out the whole body, toning the arms and the core, and providing aerobic exercise. Other water activities, like aqua jogging and water aerobics, are easier to do in social settings, which appeals to many women.
  • At-home workouts that use free weights, resistance bands, balance balls, and similar equipment appeal to women who want to fit workouts into free moments during the day.
  • Walking, jogging, and running are perfect for women who don’t want a gym membership and would prefer to exercise in the neighborhood. It’s easy to head out at any time of day for a brisk walk or a short run. One of the best ways to find motivation is to sign up for a race, like a 5K.
  • Gardening can provide strength training, especially if you’re carrying heavy items around or squatting with good form to pull weeds. Digging, shoveling, and raking also provide a great workout.
  • Cycling, either on the roads or on a stationary bike, is an easy way to get a quick cardio workout. Riding with a group can provide a nice getaway through scenic areas of your city.

Your major workouts may only happen every other day, but you should make an effort to be active in some form every day. Getting at least some physical activity each day improves your mood and energy level because exercise releases endorphins. You’ll probably find that although you may have some muscle aches, you’ll also feel more clearheaded and ready to tackle other projects after you exercise.

How to Grow with Changing Times and Your Teen

Changing Times and Your Teen

It’s okay. Everything’s okay… If you’re the parent of a teen, there’s a good chance that you’re feeling scared, confused, angry, guilty and sad about your relationship with your teen right now, so the most important message that we have to offer here is that everything’s okay. We can help you adapt to the changing times.

We Were all Teens Once, Remember?

The generational gap is very real, but it has as much to do with age as it does to do with the times. Right now your values look outdated to your teen, and their values look shallow to you. One of the most useful things that you can do for yourself right now is to think back to when you were a teen, or more importantly, to when you were a young adult, when you outgrew a lot of the things that your parents must have hated seeing you get involved in, when you started to understand your parents’ values a little better. Most importantly, you eventually grew up simply as a matter of course. Your parents couldn’t make you take your responsibilities more seriously no matter how hard they tried, you simply had to grow out of the short sighted, narrow interests we all tend to hold in our youth.

Kids Need Boundaries

Things are difficult right now and you need to set boundaries for your teen (and yes, these boundaries are just as important even when you know your teen will break them from time to time, because teaching consequences is an important part of being a parent), and you also need to provide them with security, with a place to come home to at the end of the day, a cushion to land on when they do make mistakes (and they will).

Part of being close with your teen right now is accepting that there is this gap, that your child is growing from a child into a young adult, and that they need to make their own path and make their own mistakes. That said, this doesn’t mean that you can’t still be both a parent and a friend to your teen.

Connect on Common Ground

You’ve been through this exact same kind of thing in a lot of relationships before with friends, spouses, family members: Simply trying to take an interest in what they take an interest in can be an enormous step forward. Their music might sound like crazy people banging on trash can lids to you, but that doesn’t mean you can’t findsome common ground somewhere. It could be a movie that you both like, a song that you both love, a book you’ve both read. Whatever that common ground is, no matter how small it may seem, it’s reason enough to start talking.

And that’s the heart of the solution: keeping up with the changing times, keeping up with your teen, is not a process that’s going to involve your picking up a bunch of hip magazines and trying desperately to figure out what the kids are into these days. As long as you stay roughly up to date on the technology and take the time to really talk with your teen at least once or twice a week, there’s very little fear of falling behind.

Genuine Interest leads to Genuine Relationships

There are no tricks, there’s no magic bullet, there’s no strategy that you can put into play here. It’s all about human closeness, it’s all about expressing real love and real interest and real caring. As long as you make an effort to listen, your teen will make an effort to talk.